You Might be A Mother If....

1. You have been used as a personal napkin on more than one occasion.
2. You have company over and you tell them to eat their vegetables, without even thinking about it.
3. You have a shopping spree, and not one item in the cart is for you.
4. The words "MOM" or "Mother" cause you to cringe and hurriedly try to finish whatever it was you were doing, or sound like swear words on occasion. "MUUUTHER"
5. You have an audience every time you go to the bathroom.
6. Leaving the house is a chore that takes as long as washing the dishes.
7. Silence terrifies you and causes your super hero senses to tingle like spider mans.
8. Your phone conversations sound something like "Yes, I took care of that and I will get that to you as soon as you... GET DOWN FROM THERE RIGHT NOW!"
9. The half an hour before you go to bed is counted as a vacation, and starts with a long deep breath and sigh, followed by running of hands through your hair.
10. You love someone so much it hurts even when they are mocking you, pooping on you, throwing up on you, and arguing with you.
11. Sticky tables are a continuous problem that have to be dealt with on a daily basis.
12. Adult conversation withdrawal leads you to talk to every cashier, store clerk, and willing passerby that comes along. This could conversely also lead to excessive blogging about silly subjects, and two hour phone conversations about anything imaginable.
13. You think everyone wants to know about your child's school performance, recital, and dentists visit.


Finally,

You might be a Mother if: you find this post funny, and applicable to everyday life. You can now leave a funny "you might be a mother if" in the comments section if you so choose and I will add it into the list for the post along with proper credit.


14. "You have ever carried Cheerios or juice boxes in your purse." Contributed by CelesteB.